Two lawyers arrive at the pub and order a couple of drinks. They then take sandwiches from their briefcases and began to eat. Seeing this, the angry publican approaches them and says, ‘Excuse me, but you cannot eat your own sandwiches in here!’ The two look at each other, shrug and exchange sandwiches.
A drunk was sitting in a bar looking at three small brown pellets in his hand. The bartender asked what they were, and the drunk replied “They are brain pills…they make you smart.” The bartender says excitedly, “Give me one.” He snatches one from the drunks hand, and gulps it quickly down with water. In […]
A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments, “You look terrible. What’s the problem?” “My mother died in June,” he said, “and left me $10,000.” “Gee, that’s tough,” he replied. “Then in July,” the friend continued, “My father died leaving me $50,000.” “Wow. Two […]
There was a husband and his wife sitting next to a drunk in a bar. Suddenly the drunk stands up and yells, “Attention all!!” and farts loudly. The wife is extremely embarrassed, and the husband looks at the drunk and says, “Excuse me, you just farted before my wife.” The drunks replies, “I’m sorry I […]